Only in dreams

dream [dreem] n.
1. a succession of images, thoughts, or emotions passing through the mind during sleep.
2. an involuntary vision occurring to a person when awake.
3. a vision voluntarily indulged in while awake; daydream; reverie.
4. an aspiration; goal; aim: A trip to Europe is his dream.
5. a wild or vain fancy.
6. something of an unreal beauty, charm, or excellence.


Taurus: Pay close attention to a daydream you keep having. It just might have the key to making your goals a reality.


I dream. I love to dream. I wish I could write down every dream I have ever had. The sad thing is, I don't often remember my dreams. One dream I do remember recently is pretty scary. I was at home and all of a sudden, my teeth started to become loose and fall out this way and that. Before I knew it, I was missing almost all of my teeth. First of all, I can't imagine life without teeth. Secondly, I can't imagine my mouth without teeth. Thirdly, I love my teeth and I never want to lose them!

I have always been interested in the interpretation of dreams, so I got online and immediately googled a dream dictionary. When I typed "teeth" into the search bar on the dictionary website, I got an array of hits. I scrolled down the list until I found what I was looking for, "loose teeth". Apparently when one dreams about losing teeth, the dream signifies some type of failure or bad news. Boy was that true. I can't believe how accurate a dream about teeth could be when compared to my life while I am awake.

Right now I am on a kick where I want to try to write down the dreams I have every morning and then see what they mean. I am really just wondering if all of them are so incredibly accurate.

Lucian Freud: Marathon Man

If you go to Google, you can search anything from "new painters" to "modern influential artists" and you will find an array of names that you have probably never heard of, even those of us in the artistic community. There are few artists today that spark recognition in the viewer. Fine artists and art lovers the same, can attest to the fact that one name has been very influential for the past few decades. Lucian Freud.

Lucian Freud is one of the most influential, innovative painters of our time. He paints absolutely gorgeous portraits using thick, creamy brush strokes that, oddly enough, make the figures appear to be living. If you look at a Freud, you are looking at what looks like a breathing figure, his work is alive. The key to his work is his dedication. He works endlessly on a single painting for months, even years.

The idea of spending months on one painting is quite ridiculous to me because, as a student, I do not have to ability to work so meticulously. For example, I am in a figure drawing class right now and each class we begin a new drawing and once class is over, we never revisit it. Apparently, the skill of being able to paint quickly will help me to become a better painter. Even if there is a possibility of a good learning experience, it is no less frustrating. I have a hard time painting on small surfaces and an even harder time completing a whole 16"x20" painting in one and a half hours. To me, this is not something that I need to know how to do because I never paint on such small surfaces and I never can only give 2 hours to a whole painting. Unfortunately, I am not Lucian Freud and my painting do not sell for millions of dollars and I do not have the choice of whether or not I will complete the assignments I am given.

Apparently some people find Freud's work hard to look at, but some, like me, find it a joy to behold.

16 April 1905

"In this world, time is like a flow of water, occasionally displaced by a bit of debris, a passing breeze. Now and then, some cosmic disturbance will cause a rivulet of time to turn away from the mainstream, to make connection backstream. When this happens, birds, soil, people caught in the branching tributary find themselves suddenly carried to the past." - Alan Lightman, Einstein's Dreams.

Einstein's Dreams is one of the most engaging novels I have read recently. I thoroughly enjoyed each page and found that once I began reading, I couldn't put it down. As I read, each story broke my heart a little bit, but at the same time I became enamored with the inventive theories of how time could be explained. I fell in love with Einstein's theories and realized how many of them I had thought about before. In particular was the theory presented in the April 16th entry, time travel.



Recently, without regard to how my actions could change the future, I have wished that I could travel back in time. I have always been incredibly fascinated by the fact that each decision I have made in my life, if changed, could radically alter everything I've known up until now.

What if I: applied to Carver and didn't go to Catonsville, decided to take Spanish instead of French, had gone out on that date, decided that it wasn't worth being friends with a backstabber, told him I didn't like him (even if it was a lie), hadn't gone back for more, had gone to MICA or Corcoran, hadn't decided that I wanted to get away from home, called him once in a while just to check in, hadn't given him the cold shoulder, had taken him more seriously the last few months I knew him, had just asked how he was doing, had let him kiss me, hadn't made a joke about him crying, had showed I cared.

I would take a lot back, change a lot of things, if I could make things turn out differently. Time is a funny thing, you never know when you're running out of it. I wonder what would happen if even one of the smallest threads that have been woven together to create the tapestry of my life for the past 6 years was altered. I guess the reason we must say, live life with no regrets, is because we can't change the past. But sometimes I believe that time travel could erase that notion because maybe if we could change the mistakes we have made, there wouldn't be anything to regret.

I guess I should just burst my bubble already because it's really just futile to think about all of this for one reason: time travel is impossible because of the grandfather paradox. Imagine that you build a machine that can transport you throughout time. It is possible for you to travel back in time, and meet your grandfather before he has any kids and kill him. If this happened, you would never have been born and the machine would never have been built. Thus, a paradox. I mean, look at Back to the Future, Marty almost completely disappeared from that picture!

It is nice to take a break from reality once in a while to dream though, isn't it?

"Nosce te Ipsum"

To work jointly with others or together especially in an intellectual endeavor

Collaboration. In class last week, I spoke a lot about how important collaboration is to me, but how it also affects the concepts of ownership and authorship. A personal example that I can give is this: in Time Studio last year, I had to create a collaborative project in which each member of my class would have to contribute something to the final product. I decided that I would give the class five minutes to write down their thoughts/feelings on a selection of topics I had chosen for them. The questions included: what does the color red/blue/yellow feel like; what does sadness/fear/happiness/anger smell like; what does abstract sound like. The link below is a short Powerpoint which shows each page of the book (example shown below).

Collaborative book

The fact that I had the idea to create the collaboration and that I put the book together may lead one to believe that the project was entirely my own, but what about the actual responses? Without the people, you have no responses. Without the responses, you have no book. This provides quite a strong argument that a product of a collaborative project is just that, a collaborative product! Everyone who participted in the process is a partial "owner", if you will.

On a similar note, I spoke about the website www.learningtoloveyoumore.com and how I really enjoy it's collaborative aspects. In case you were wondering, LTLYM is an interactive website and a series of non-web presentations that allow viewers to participate in creative assignments created by Miranda July and Harrell Fletcher.


In dealing with a project like this, who owns the rights to anything hosted on the website? I would, in this case, believe that the creator of the solution would be the owner, as is assumed under current copyright law. In a co-op like this, ownership isn't really that much of a problem, but if the Orphan Works Act is passed, the days of implied copyright will be over. To learn more about the Orphan Works Act I would suggest listening to this interview with Brad Holland of the IPA (Illustrator's Partnership of America) or taking a quick peek at a summary of how the legislation will affect artists. I am not implying that collaboration is in any way bad for the artistic community because I believe the complete opposite (and have shown that collaboration is quite important to me), what I do believe is that the ability to use another person's creative work for monetary gain without permission and compensation is ridiculous. In this technological world there are positives and negatives, but the internet could prove to be very harmful in many areas of our lives including those which govern our morals. Is it okay to cheat, steal and lie? The consensus is no, in most cases, but passing an act such as the Orphan Works legislation will condone and allow just that. Right now, we need to collaborate, to make sure that an incredible injustice, passed off as something that will help grandma find old pictures and use them for her own devices, is not made into a reality.

Oh yeah, here are some of the assignments I have completed:

#70: Say Goodbye.
#63: Make an Encouraging banner.
#52: Write the phone call you wish you could have.
#11: Photograph a scar and write about it.

Everyone should do some of the assignments, or even just look over the solutions that other people have come up with. It really is amazing to look at how many different points of view come from one starting point.